June

Where has the time gone? Fast/slow all at once it seems and another June has come along.

A few things: I have been doing lots of farm therapy, mainly on the East Side. This past weekend project was building grain bins which was awesome because hello, working with wood = something I love and also tools. Farmers market on Saturdays.

I definitely feel more and more grounded.

I have also been mowing my yard like no one's business - as you know, this is one of my favorite things + very zen. Planting flowers: morning glories and petunias and clary sage and lavender and fushia and this and that. Need to get my hands on some sunflower seeds and/or wild sunflowers for sure. I have a whole area in the front prepared and I am going to perennial the shit out that space, all wild flowers and stuff. I planted a lilac bush and want to plant a million more. The purple cone flowers that were already here are blooming now, nice and tall. Alas, the poppies I planted did not make it. Will try again next year. I am also holding out hope for the tiny nasturtiums sprouts to make it. The hollyhocks are going to be huge. I am in love with my kitchen herb garden. Two of my three butterfly bushes are growing well/blooming. The third, on a shady north side, not so much. I have plans and plans for hostas on that side. Trumpet vines (or as we called them, 'witch's fingers') all along the back with the honeysuckle. I planted some horsetail grass in a nice shady spot near the downspout. I need more peonies. Definitely not enough peonies in my yard yet. There are a few spots reserved for new trees - I am thinking honey locust or lilac trees or more redbuds or perhaps an apple/cherry/other fruit tree? Yes to all I think.

The lightning bugs are out. It's summer for sure. The light at the end of the day reminds me of home. My new one and my old.

And June.

ETA: This

Went there, came back

Egads, I forgot to celebrate my 1 year anniversary of escaping DC last Sunday! Remember when I did that? Like a whole year ago when I gave two weeks notice at Robotech and had a moving Pod come and haul all my stuff back home to here? No more metro hell? Happy anniversary to me!

Second thing is that we had a snow storm today which, if you are counting, is merely 1 day after it was 65 degrees and sunny when my girlfriend Rachel Maddow came to town and I guess people in the bar were too loud or something and no one could hear her on the TeeVee which I relate to because I was stuck outside on the porch and couldn't hear a damn thing she was saying either but she looked good so there's that.

(Tell not my old English teachers about the previous run-on sentence. It's called 'experiential writing', Mrs. Fetters).

What else? I'm starting to have to attend more dinners and functions as "The Offical Girlfriend" which means best behavior or something. And lots of questions. So what do you do? Uh huh. How'd you meet? Dinner on Sat being a prime example. And a trip to Dallas for a family thing with parents and sister and such. I was honestly hoping to fly under the radar a bit more but what can you do.

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my bathroom? I would marry it if I could but now that the Republicans are back in charge in this state, fat chance of that. Why must they ruin everything? Soon I may have to do a news moratorium.

I think that's it. Main point: What a difference a year makes! Second point: It's all good.

Home repair is fun

Remodeling your bathroom is not for those with a faint heart or a dearth of cash. I thought I was all that and a bag of chips when I replaced a wax seal years ago. Oh, I was so young and innocent then.

We are on week two now. I have not been able to sleep at my own house for 1.5 weeks of those 2. I contracted this work out b/c 1) I had to gut the whole thing and replace rotten subflooring which hello I like tools and wood as much as the next person but I know when I don't know what I am doing which would have been then/now; 2) I needed to get it done before I have a Swiss Renter for three months who will be renting/paying for my clawfoot tub starting Feb 1 and at this point, I am wondering why I agreed to a renter but whatever, it's only for a little while and I get a tub out of the deal; and 3) good lord who has the time to remodel your own bathroom these days like when would I be able to knock down a wall and re-route plumbing and re-wire and drywall and etc etc = never. So that is where we stand. I also need you to pray for the safe and speedy delivery of my clawfoot tub which is being driven god knows where out of Pennsylvania to here and if it doesn't come tomorrow, they can't deliver until Tues. I don't even know what to say anymore. I am trying to be zen throughout this whole ordeal. And failing.

Would you like to geek out on some before, during, and after pix? Sure you would because what could be more exciting than looking at someone else's bathroom is what I say. You will have to wait for the 'after' pix until after whenever that is but hopefully Mon or Tues lord willing. Here you go:

This was taken in July when I was looking to buy the place:



This was when the side wall was knocked out and the toilet still worked. Those were the days..



This is total gutted and new subfloor installed. The toilet is but a dream.



This is The Farmer planing my wood. Which is not a euphemism but should be.



This is drywalled and repurposed wood floors installed. Please note the arrow where the toilet will be hopefully tomorrow.



Stay tuned for more during/after pix. Yes, I know, very riveting. Very edgy. The excitement is palpable.

Edited: Here you go, the moment you've been waiting for. My bathroom is DUN holla.

new resolution year

So what does the end of the year bring I ask. Here's my general assessment: It has been one fucking long year. Hey, quick rundown! For posterity: DC, glimmer of hope, blizzardDC, new job, Home!, packpackpackmovemovemove, rent, farm therapy, black dogs happy, work and then work harder and more so you can pay a million bucks in taxes but hello --> BUY FIRST HOME EVER WHICH IS NOW YOUR ONE AND ONLY LOVE, this will happen again, I think, also travel/travel/travelX3, farm therapy + 1, Packed Boxes Unpacked (after 3-4-5 years), and now today.

Yes, so it's been a long year of a million changes and etc. On the whole, very good stuff. Everything I like. Next year, more of the same minus the change please. I'm having a party Friday night, FYI, SO BYOB.

I think we're superstars

Howdy. So yes, I am trying not to get overwhelmed by the amt of work I need to do between now and then and also hello I have to go back to San Antonio on Sunday for seriously the third time in 3 months which really how many times does one need to see the Alamo is my question. Here's what else:

I purchased a desk, bookcase, file cabinet, and wheelie deal desk thing for my iMac Betty who I can now cart around the house wherever I should like her to be. It's not as creepy as it sounds or like that Xfiles episode where they kept mom on a cart up under the bed for breeding which honestly is one of the most twisted things I've seen on TV. But enough about Betty - my office furniture is going to rock as soon as I actually assemble. And even more honestly, I probably won't assemble it, The Farmer is gung-ho about doing so bc she likes to feel handy and butch so I will let her.

I have a splinter. Left ringer finger if you must know.

The weekend after next I have farm watch duties out at the girls. The last time we had a nice roaring fire and I let their 30 chickens out to roam all day while the Algerian got all drunk and visited the goats. It was eventful! I promised him I would go join him camping during that weekend out by the lake. We have done a million and one winter camping situations so I'm prepped but aye, ever since that whole DC deal, I have become soft and not as campy. That will change come hell/high water.

My friend DK got tix to the chiefs-raiders game on Jan 2 for us. I pray that it will not be -10. Either way, hello Arrowhead = my one/only love (in addition to wine, women, song).

In case you haven't noticed, I am avoiding the work that I should be doing tonight. Question: Will I actually do what needs to be done or will I simply try to do it all tomorrow morning which honestly is most likely? Answer: Somewhere between the truth and a lie.

What else? Probably that I have been all up into The xx of late. I don't care if I'm a little late to the party, I like them. Had one song on a mix someone made for me and just rediscovered them. British! Youth! Emo!

Finally, I am pretending not to notice that it's coming on Christmas, they're cutting down trees, putting up reindeer and singing songs of joy and peace. I wish I had a river I could skate away on.

My day

Things I did today in chronological order:

1. Woken up by a text message (content: "slow moving this morning. going down to do animals then need to open hoop house. where are u?"; my response: "I just woke up so don't hurry")
2. Walked dogs one block north, three blocks east, one block south, three blocks west
3. Took a shower
4. Farmer arrived
5. Put on coffee
5. Diet Pepsi
6. Read the Sunday KC Star - all sections
7. Imported a million CDs so I could get rid of them*
8. Unpacked 8-10 boxes, sorted, organized, assembled shelving, finally found three things I had been looking for since February 2010 = 1. my umbrella, 2. the cord to connect my digital camera, 3. my favorite pocketknife.
9. Checked my Fantasy Football score (currently up 95-90 but not looking good)*
10. Dogs out/dogs in/dogs out/dogs in*
11. Warmed up a cup of soup
12. Tended to sick Farmer*
13. Semi-nap on couch for 15 minutes
14. Chiefs game watching hello
15. Took gatorade and Emergent C over to my sick strai friend A who also had flu**
16. Wrote a short evaluation for a sustainable agriculture grant
17. Watched more football
18. Got tangled in blanket from couch while standing and fell on hardwood floor, felt as if possibly cracked my kneecap off my leg or something sim (scorecard for those keeping track: 3 semi-serious falls in 2010 resulting in varying degrees of injury from broken foot to cracked assbone to kneecap fuck)
19. Found last remaining Lortab!
20. Sudden burst of energy = load of laundry, carrying out recycled boxes and trash, writing an entire blogpost about my day in chronological order up until this very moment the end.


* denotes multiple occurrences/ongoing activity
** revision of prevailing thought on my own diagnosis from flu to food poisoning back to flu

Guess things are different here out in the country

Hello to you. It's been a long week of ups and downs I have to say. Recap: Work travel travel bombshell work play work. All I can say is that I'm glad it's the weekend so I can try to up the play a little bit.

Right now, it's what, 1130pm on a Sat night and I took a little break from writing a final project report to create a quick LJ/Bird tumblr because hello why not I like to have the point and post slash handy all in one place. And clearly, I am avoiding the report writing by blog writing this very post so you know.

Good things of late since I don't want to focus on the kinda major bad thing that happened this week which will affect my life/choices in some way although I'm not sure how yet: 1) The drive to western Kansas was lovely as always, it looked a lot like this:



2) I got the word that I will continue on my consulting gig ($$) for the next year with a group of folks I really like even if it means I have to go back to that Damn City again in a few weeks on my actual birthday so I better not get stuck there again I mean it; 3) Hello the Seattle Storm won the damned WNBA championship in case you hadn't noticed; 4) Spent some quality time with my new galfriend last night out in the country on her farm and it's really nice to hang with someone again, though you know, it's still hard, but it's good too; 5) I mowed the grass today even though the humidity was 1 million but you know how much I love mowing grass which is a lot and I bought a lilac bush and an early amethyst beautyberry bush to plant in the yard not sure where yet but it makes me happy; 6) Tomorrow I will help friends build some wooden sides for their flatbed 1/2 ton truck which of course means that I will finally be getting some wood action with my tools and man I miss the heck out of that; and 7) The dogs are snoring right now and it's quiet outside and some storms kinda came though so it will be a good night for sleeping in this house that I love like no one's business.

Enough of this chitchat, I need to write words that make sense even though no one in our damn government is going to read them. Goodnight to you.

you and your anchor tattoo

I'm tired and unclear why I am still awake right now. Been kind of a whirlwind of various/sundry and it's not really going to stop anytime soon. No, it's not going to stop until you wise up. Or so they say.

The good thing is that I am busy and things are good and lots going on and some potential romance and the hot weather is breaking and the kids on campus make me feel old because they are so young and I am not sure where the summer went and canoe trip coming up and texas and football season and the cicadas are still loud loud and I'm trying not to think about you and failing most of the time and the moon is out tonight and a storm is coming in and this:

Door handle

So I moved some of my stuff in tonight. Borrowed a friend's pickup truck and loaded/unloaded three trips full of stuff. In a million degrees. My sweat was sweating. Am definitely not complaining, just saying. My friends called me giddy last night when I was showing them around. Trust me, I am not the giddy sort. I do not do giddy. But hello, MY OWN HOUSE IT'S MINE ALL MINE EXCEPT THE PART THAT THE BANK OWNS BUT WHO CARES MY OWN PERFECT LITTLE HOUSE YAY!

Ahem.

And so, I now have a reason to use my "tool time" and "wood" tags on blog posts again. Here's where my shop is going:



And my private little backyard where I will have garden parties and plant stuff and hang out with the dogs and various/sundry MY YARD HELLO WOO stuff:



Yeah, I'm sure my posts for awhile are gonna be all housey and whatnot. I will try to do exciting things in itand report back. Like COOK AND HAVE PARTIES AND SET UP MY CUTE LITTLE LIBRARY/READING ROOM WITH ALL KINDS OF SUN AND WINDOWS ALL AROUND IT AND ALSO AND AND ETC.

Until then, I am off to find that door handle that I was looking for:

We are hummingbirds who lost the plot

Hello to you!

Here is what I have done today: coffee in the morning and by coffee I mean meeting the boys down to have a diet pepsi in front of the coffee shop and reading the paper, two - phone call, phone call, email email email, phone call, email email, next I came home and took a tiny nap and then I rode my bike downtown and the rest of the evening was spent socially. I'm looking forward to going to bed and doing sort of the same thing tomorrow.

Another thing that happened is my mortgage was finally approved after scanning/copying/signing every scrap piece of paper and transaction record including how many times over the past years I have slept with people I regret (5ish). Fucking prisoners clearly have had it less tedious than I have. Despite all that, I am now almost an official homeowner. The reasons I am excited about this are many but suffice to say, I cannot wait. I don't get too sentimental about too many things but I do have to say that owning my own piece of property and land feels pretty good. Also being able to do whatever I want with it without worrying about a landlord or whatever is woo hoo.

So I like my Saturdays b/c it involves sleeping in a little getting some coffee/catching up, farmers market, a little lunch and then possibly a nap. I will make all of that happen and also do work work at my office office. Wish me luck in self motivating.

Right now, that's all I have to say. I should probably start packing and planning my move but honestly, most of my stuff is still in boxes (oh hai, remember when I kept boxes in my last apt unopened for over a year?) so it will be easy. If I can get my shit together for a yard sale next weekend, I will be happy to tell you all about the colorful characters living in my neighborhood such as the guy who broke into his own apt window and ran off with stuff and on whom I summoned the cops on Monday. If not, I will try to fill you in of house details when able. I'm pretending that the next month or so is not as full of travel as it actually will be and that I don't have a million things to do. Complaining is for babies.

Also coming to a store near you: Predict how I will feel about having to return to DC in less than a month! Win prizes for my reaction to being on the Metro again! Feel the love!

Wherein I discuss chickens etc

Oh man. So blogging and real life = not mixing of late. However that does not mean that I haven't been writing my ass off, traveling hither and yon, buying the fuck out of a house, and still soaking in life. All of which is to say that while I am happy to share such with this blogger situation, I have yet been able to find the time to do so. Until now. Which means sharing a tiny bit at 1135pmCST on a Fri night after having one of the most relaxing farm situations wherein I cooked for my friends (chicken pesto farafalle), watched the now-big chicks run around their outdoor chicken fence, walked around the fields with my dogs and friends under a big sky and no people/noise/thinking which really helped decompress I must say. So life is good. Tomorrow: Farmers market, more farm therapy, beer, friends, hard work, settling in, being me. Cannot complain. I'd write more but you know, back in the midwest means saying little, feeling lots. All in all = yay!

Morchella bordello

Quick rundown of life here:

1. I have pitchfork-elbow from helping plant 100 tomato plants and mulching a bunch of hay on the girls' farm last night. I can barely bend my left arm. Of course, I'm not using it for much else so no worries!

2. My strai friend A has a bday tomorrow and so we had pizza and beer tonight. She calls it celebrating her bday season. I say fine.

3. It has been rainy and cold here which is weird for May - I've found 6 spike morel mushrooms growing in my own front yard. They smell like a locker room and I am no fan, but have picked them for my friends. This weekend promises to be in the 80s and sunny so woo to the hoo.

4. I was in a series of meetings from 930am to 415pm today. I literally had time to use the restroom once. This is no way to live!

5. The dogs have been appreciating their country life. And by country, I mean grass and things that normal animals take for granted. It is like they have reclaimed their country dog selves and are rolling all over stuff, smelling actual things that occur in nature, and basically living life. I think they also do not miss all of the concrete and bullshit from out east. I like them like this.

6. I found my glasses by the way. I had placed them in a 'safe place' out at the farm which of course was a window sill ledge far away from anyone/thing. I also took two naps on Sunday to recover and quite frankly am still tired. Oh age! Why must you vex me so?

7. Soon I will be househunting for reals (as they say). In other words, I am looking forward to home ownership and believe that by the early/mid summer, I will have my own crib. Aww ya, MTV cribs KS style. When this event occurs, there will be pictures and stories of parties and cookouts and various/sundry home-related topics the likes of which this blog has never seen. Soon I will unpack all of those tools I have had packed up for 3.2 years and I will be cutting some fucking wood and nailing some shit left/right. Holla.

8. Who else is excited about the new WNBA season? I am. Go Storm. That's all I have to say about that.

9. You know how Harry Potter has that scar on his forehead? I took a shower last night and this am, got ready for work etc etc sans hair washing and noticed that in the back of my head, I have this sorta jagged bald area that looks not unlike a lightning bolt. Now, I have a decent head of hair, so imagine my surprise at this situation. I'm going to have to do a back comb-over to cover that shit up. Aside: My favorite poet Mary Oliver admitted that she's currently reading the Harry Potter series. This is prob why I love her like a hurricane.

10. I leave you with a Chick Flick I took at the girls' farm a few weeks ago:

Perfect imperial distance

In honor of seeing my all time favorite poet, Mary Oliver, tonight.


The Sun - Mary Oliver

Have you ever seen
anything
in your life
more wonderful

than the way the sun,
every evening,
relaxed and easy,
floats toward the horizon

and into the clouds or the hills,
or the rumpled sea,
and is gone--
and how it slides again

out of the blackness,
every morning,
on the other side of the world,
like a red flower

streaming upward on its heavenly oils,
say, on a morning in early summer,
at its perfect imperial distance--
and have you ever felt for anything
such wild love--
do you think there is anywhere, in any language,
a word billowing enough
for the pleasure

that fills you,
as the sun
reaches out,
as it warms you

as you stand there,
empty-handed--
or have you too
turned from this world--

or have you too
gone crazy
for power,
for things?

Bringing on the weather

Yes Virginia, I do have a blog that I've been too busy to update. Rest assured that will happen more often (it is hoped). I will say that since I last posted, I almost ran off to marry a 60 year old cowboy who works for the local extension office, I helped plant 75lbs of potatoes, helped build a chicken roost in the coop, and more or less have been non-stop happy/content/midwestern 24/7. Life is good.



ps. I have been trying to remember what it felt like when I lived in DC a mere two months ago, just to compare/contrast. I honestly feel like that was another country and I was another person. Since I've been here, I haven't looked back hardly at all. A story here or there about the traffic, the life, the work. I'm here now, living a life again, and it's weird to think that a place can have such a hold on you and make you happy, like flipping a switch, like opening a door, like seeing every blade of soft green grass with a new pair of glasses. That's what it feels like.

Only good days caught on camera

Here is the story of your life lately:


1. You Put an End to the DC Beltway Madness Once and For All Goodbye Dumb City Traffic



2. Your Big Dog Catches Air On Road West



3. You Stop Over in Your Hometown America and Drive Down Main Street



4. A Bunch of New Baby Goats Greet You



5. You Break Your Foot On Second Day Home and Still Hobble a Month Later



5a. You also worry that some foot fetish guy will find your site and wank off to your foot pix

6. You Have Breakfast Near B. Self and Take A Surreptitious Paparazzi-Style Picture



7. You Do This. A lot.



8. You Stare at a Cow and Forget You Were Ever a Part of (see #1).



9. You Are Reminded, However, That You Are Back in the Bible Belt/Red State



10. Your Dogs Remember That They Are Country Dogs and Dig Like the Old Days/Are Happy



11. You Post A Full-On Picture of Yourself to Prove That You Are Ridiculously and Midwesternly Happy Which You Will Take Down The Next Day and Replace with a Pix of a Baby Chick






The End. Until tomorrow. When the beat goes on...

First day of spring

I have been hitting the weather jackpot of late. Can't complain.

Gotta go there to come back

Well hello to you. Long time no. Howev, this does not mean I'm not thinking about the no we are not having. Know what I mean? I think you do.

But more to the point, HI!! I am still alive, I am still in the best place I could be, I am still hobbling around as a result of an undiagnosed broken foot (but it's ok, I know what I'm doing or if I don't, I will accept ppl saying I told you so as they have been harping on me for weeks), I am still trying to find shit in boxes, and I am still loving being here.

What does that all mean, you ask? I say it means that things are good/busy/transitiony and I'm trying to get my shit together while trying to adjust to the fact that I don't have to get on a plane and fly back to Dumb City. It also means that my internet is not really set up - I'm stealing shaky wireless as we speak - and having way too many beers and also going to bed at like 930 every night. Lots of weirdness going on but here I am.

So hang in there. I shall report on farms and goats and college towns as soon as I am able. My dogs are happy so all is well. Good day to you!

Life is good

Big sky, sun, spring coming soon. All is well in the heartland.

3 years: An inventory

You know what's weird? Almost to the day 3 years ago, I was in the exact same situation as I am right now: preparing to move across country. Heck, this feels familiar. I have been thinking about this a lot in the last couple of weeks when things finally came together for me. Now is a good time to take stock.

Three years is a long time and also not really. I always knew the move would be temporary, even before I arrived. Moving to DC was to support another person's dream. And also, I had fewer choices, career-wise, at the time. Sometimes, we do what we must for reasons that may or may not hold up down the line. That's life, nice and messy and complicated.

So I get to DC. I find a job. I break up and remain friends. I commute hours daily. I move and commute a little less. I find a way to cope (poorly? adequately?) with 4M people. I get really good at the work I am doing. I actually unpack my boxes on Inauguration day. I bide my time. I am rewarded. I prepare to leave DC.

That's the short story. The long story is in the 300 or so posts here since 2007 and all those 1000 tweets. The longer story is mostly unwritten. We all have have our own life stored away elsewhere, right? Par is in a 8X8X16 Pod container waiting to be driven across the country.

Like a good Libra, I've been trying for balance. Good/bad. Pros/Cons. Positive/Negative. Many many times while I've been here, I've failed in seeing the good. I've failed in living in the moment and appreciating the positives. I've failed at a couple of really important things. I've also done some pretty cool things and met some great people. Now is a good time to reframe, rebalance, reflect.

Things I've gained:

A sharp business savvy and better understanding of How Things Work

Detailed map of DC establishments serving over 500 beers on tap/bottles

A reputation for knowing my shit and getting things done

Profound hatred of strangers standing too close/touching me/gathering near me

An understanding of budgets and profit and how not to get screwed

A group of good friends who have made me laugh, shared my misery, and supported me

A drinking problem + a new relationship with scotch

Extensive network of business contacts that will pay off down the line

Sometimes viewing the world and people in it as 'contacts that will pay off down the line"

The 20 pounds back that I had lost in 2006

An extensive AFV (acronym-filled vocabulary) tailored for the business and social services world

More grey hair and the experience of turning 40 in this city

How to use politics and connections to get what you want/have people do what you want

Extensive travel and a shitload of airline miles and hotel points

The desire never to travel on anything called a "Beltway" again

An awesome massage therapist

An aversion to using politics to get what you want

Tones of new music

Greater appreciation for people who say what they mean/mean what they say

The ability to predict the amount of time it takes to travel a certain distance with and without traffic

Perfected recipes of beef vegetable stew, chicken pot pie, and orzo salad

The path I needed to take to get to where I'm going now...

----

See? It's all good. An arrow finds its way, you gotta go there to come back and all that jazz. Next blog post coming to you from the middle of the country. Here we go...

I am the heartland

Ah indeed, DC experienced a very lovely pile-up of snow this weekend. It's quite amazing actually and very pretty. I haven't gone outside at all except to take some pix and check things out. Alas, my dogs are up at their other mother's due to my week-long work hell so I'm missing them quite a bit. I'll go get them as soon as I'm able. I also had to cancel a scheduled massage today which kinda sucks.

But all in all, I am not complaining. I'm not complaining about the 10-12 hour days I put in last week or the fact that I schmoozed myself out being nice to all kinds of people or that I had to prep and give a talk in front of many of those people or that I had to deal with some very bullshitty corporate drama. I care not about such things and you may be asking yourself why? Why does she not give a whit about the hell that Metro was all week or that she slept a max of 6 hours every night? Why does this woman not give one shit about what is happening in this city and the millions of people who call it home?

Well, it is now safe to say (because it is a done deal/100%/no one can take it away from me) that I am finally getting out of here. A job came through back home and I am taking it. Trust, I am taking the shit out of that job and not looking back. Goodbye for-profit bottom line bullshit. Goodbye Metro hell! Goodbye too many people, awful traffic, and politics permeating every single conversation. I shall not miss you!

And this is happening fast. Like in several weeks. So that means I gotta get my shit together ASAP. But do I care? Hells no, because I get to be happy again and get to be me again and get to have a life again. With friends! And open spaces!

There will be much to repair after this experience. Not all of my time here was awful and certainly I wouldn't be in a position to take this job had I not come here and had the experience I had. It was a necessary road on the journey. However, I've got to do a lot of stuff to fix the damage - mentally, emotionally, physically - from living here and being the person I became. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I was waterboarding people (though I did entertain the notion on a few occasions). I just was having to play a game that takes a bunch out of you at the end of the day. No more!

And so, as a bunch of snow covers up the ugly and makes this city pretty for a short period of time, I am already visualizing home. It looks a lot like this: